Fourteen is fun. I can't express how much I enjoy this age. He is beyond the need of constant supervision, beyond the need to show me what he has created in the potty, beyond diaper changing, beyond tattling and yet he is just a little boy that needs his mom and dad. I think sometimes he is beyond so many of the everyday occurances that come with infants and toddlers. That it is easy to forget, to connect with him daily.
Connecting with him was easy when he was in school. He would come home from school and I would give him a daily oral quiz. You know the quiz I am talking about, we all have them for our teenagers. My quiz always included how was school, did you have any tests, did you have all your homework done, do you have homework to do, have you read your pages. The quiz became so redundant, that I think he began to prestudy for his daily quiz. To keep the quiz interesting, I would try to catch him off guard and ask a question he couldn't anticipate. One time I asked him "Did you kiss a girl today?" His face turned all red, and he said "No, Does that mean I flunked the daily quiz?"
Now school is out and I am still adjusting my schedule to meet my children's summer schedules. I realized I have not connected with this child on a personal level in a long time. Oh I have the parent dominate role down pefectly. You know the role I am talking about: the one that gives clear directions with obvious strings attached if the directions are not followed. But, we have not connected on that special parent/child level. That level that allows your child to know, that you LOVE them more then life itself and your available in any circumstance or crisis.
Today we went for a ride just mom and son. We paid bills, registered for summer camp, put gas in the van, visited grandma and grandpa, and drove around the lake. WOW, what a mom will learn if she takes the time to listen. I learned that my boy didn't know how to pump gas, we remedied that problem. I learned that today he wants to be veterinarian/art major interesting combination. I learned that he hates football, and has played the game in the past for recognition. He doesn't like to fight for any reason. I learned that he doesn't want to get into trouble, any type of trouble. I offered to let him drive my van (my older son would have been on that suggestion in a matter of seconds) My precious fourteen year old refused, saying I will get my chance when I have a permit. I hate it when my children are more rational then I am.
It was a fun morning, just me and my boy....NOTE to self....DO this more often...It is cheap, fun, and most of all entertaining. It is always entertaining when your looking at the world through the rose colored glasses of a teenager.
Connecting with him was easy when he was in school. He would come home from school and I would give him a daily oral quiz. You know the quiz I am talking about, we all have them for our teenagers. My quiz always included how was school, did you have any tests, did you have all your homework done, do you have homework to do, have you read your pages. The quiz became so redundant, that I think he began to prestudy for his daily quiz. To keep the quiz interesting, I would try to catch him off guard and ask a question he couldn't anticipate. One time I asked him "Did you kiss a girl today?" His face turned all red, and he said "No, Does that mean I flunked the daily quiz?"
Now school is out and I am still adjusting my schedule to meet my children's summer schedules. I realized I have not connected with this child on a personal level in a long time. Oh I have the parent dominate role down pefectly. You know the role I am talking about: the one that gives clear directions with obvious strings attached if the directions are not followed. But, we have not connected on that special parent/child level. That level that allows your child to know, that you LOVE them more then life itself and your available in any circumstance or crisis.
Today we went for a ride just mom and son. We paid bills, registered for summer camp, put gas in the van, visited grandma and grandpa, and drove around the lake. WOW, what a mom will learn if she takes the time to listen. I learned that my boy didn't know how to pump gas, we remedied that problem. I learned that today he wants to be veterinarian/art major interesting combination. I learned that he hates football, and has played the game in the past for recognition. He doesn't like to fight for any reason. I learned that he doesn't want to get into trouble, any type of trouble. I offered to let him drive my van (my older son would have been on that suggestion in a matter of seconds) My precious fourteen year old refused, saying I will get my chance when I have a permit. I hate it when my children are more rational then I am.
It was a fun morning, just me and my boy....NOTE to self....DO this more often...It is cheap, fun, and most of all entertaining. It is always entertaining when your looking at the world through the rose colored glasses of a teenager.
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